Reply to Divorce - delaying the inevitable

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm so sorry you're going through this.

Is it possible he is threatening divorce to try to get you to change?  You don't need to "participate" for him to move forward with divorce. When he brings it up, can you just say, well, if that's what you want, I can't stop you?  Is he really going to take the initiative to move out, find a lawyer, provide all the info the lawyer requires, etc.?  If I were you I would not "help" him and would not engage in his musings about finding his own apartment, etc.  I would, however, without letting him know, find my own lawyer and be ready to respond if he does file. His own inertia may delay things until the kids are older.
[/quote]

This is a good point. My DH threatened me all year and harassed me. I know he retained a lawyer. I quietly retained my own and have not helped him in anyway. He now seems to be over the peak of whatever midlife crisis he was in. I am over him, and am just waiting to see whether he shapes up. In the meantime I’m carving out a separate life and making my preparations. I’m not in a hurry to make any sudden moves as the kids are young.

My DH is incredibly lazy and selfish, I don’t think he wants to go through all the work of the divorce. He just wants to point fingers and blame others for his unhappiness.[/quote]

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