Reply to Was having kids worth the risk it took on your looks?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]For me, there was no question.  I always wanted kids and am happy to have them.  I also got lucky and got two awesome kids.

But, seriously, if you are even asking this question, just don't have kids.  Your priorities are screwed up.  If you were asking about risks to your -health- and the changes that can happen with pregnancy to your health, that would be one thing.  But your looks?  Nope.   Don't have kids.  Just do what you do best and focus on yourself.[/quote]

Disagree, it's a fine question to ask. Your looks are part of who you are, and feeling upset about your changing body is a really common effect of pregnancy and parenting (also associated with PPD). And that's without the unrealistic pressure we put on women to "bounce back." We are allowed to care how we look.

Worrying about this does not make OP unfit to parent, it makes her honest with herself about whether she's ready to be a parent. [/quote]

Can't possibly disagree more.  If this is a big point of concern for OP, s/he is in no way ready to be a parent.  S/he will not have total control over this outcome, or any other part of the outcome, for that matter.  There are already too many selfish, immature people out there sucking at parenting.  There is no shortage of children in the world.  Anyone who isn't all-in on being a parent should just abstain.  [/quote]

Dp. Yes starting with you. Someone who is so quick to judge a first time would be parent has no business judging other would be moms who haven't even started to parent. This sub is filled with women complaining about being frumpy and you definitely seem like you fit the mold. If you're not concerned about your looks why are you here?[/quote]

Nope.  If you are so self-involved that worries about 10 lbs or gray hair would actually be a consideration as you think about whether or not to be a parent, you aren't ready to be a parent.  Being a parent comes with a lot of uncertainty and self-sacrifice.  Do you have to just give up on your looks entirely...of course not!  But time alone will change your looks and the stress of pregnancy and being a parent can have effects you can't control.  To be a parent, you should be mature enough to keep your looks in perspective.  There are so many other things worth worrying about when it comes to parenting.

You are sad that you can't understand that someone can have a healthy perspective on looks that isn't all or nothing. Or maybe the post just hit a little close to home??[/quote]

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