Reply to If you wanted a third, but dreaded newborn phase again

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, [b]how much extra bandwidth do you have in your life, generally?  Work flexibility, money, support (family or otherwise), time, etc.? [/b] So many people "don't feel done" and then realize that the additional kid pushed them past their capacity.  It often ends up okay, but you need to consider the need to "feel done" with the very real changes a third child brings.

Also, parenting older kids is a whole other ball of wax.  Easier in some ways, harder than others.  You can't predict how you'll be with teens, but if you're generally able to not let little things (purees, BLW, etc.) go, consider the chaos of a third generally.  Maybe that third kid helps you chill and it'll be great.  Maybe not.  Who knows.  My third was the toughest sleeper (still has night terrors, at 7.5), the most sensitive in some ways.  We wanted him fully and our family is complete, but you can't buy into the "third children are easy" rhetoric that some people insist on.[/quote]

This question was pretty much why we stopped at two.  We were at a point in life where we felt like we had enough slack in the family to consider a third, but it was because we had that slack that we decided not to.  It's really, really healthy to have a little extra bandwidth.  You never know when there will be a health crisis, a work crisis, a global pandemic, whatever.  Heck, even just a bad rainstorm with some basement flooding and a closed preschool, and I honestly thought how glad I was that there wasn't a baby in the mix, too.  Not to say that all families are like mine.  We don't have a nanny (and I wouldn't want to manage another adult in the house even if they were adding tremendous value and saving time in other ways).  But the basic point is that having 2 gives us more slack and more time to enjoy the "down time", and also gives us a bit more leeway to navigate the harder times in life, too.[/quote]

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