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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Some of these posters who claim they would just tell the kid to just shut up & grow a pair might be telling the truth, but I suspect most of these are all tough talk & no action. [/quote]

We’ll never know because our kids will never be ruminating about their 5th choice.[/quote]

Personally, when my kid was deferred ED1 from their Top choice (my alma mater/T10 school), we let them be upset/take it in/mope around for 24 hours, then we reminded them that they had already been accepted at 2 of their T5 choices but they still had a choice at the ED1 for RD (not really the acceptance rate is less than 5% and we made kid well aware it's a lottery).  We helped them get excited about their choices---those they already had acceptances to and those they were still waiting to hear from and focused on getting the remaining applications in with strong essays/etc.

Similarly, when the ultimate rejection came from the T10/ED1, we let them be upset for 24 hours and then helped them get excited about all their other choices----they applied to 12 schools, got rejected at ED1, WL at a T25 (3rd choice), First year overseas at another which they had already decided was too big/not their place, and accepted with merit at EVERY OTHER choice, including their 2nd choice.  Not too shabby, only rejected at schools with acceptance rates below 5-9%.    So we focused on planning return trips to the top 3 acceptances (and offered a return trip to the WL if they wanted but secretly hoped they didn't) and got busy helping them decide where they would attend college.  Ultimately they picked their 2nd choice, which I personally think was a much better fit for them overall and they are extremely happy there.

It's our job as a parent to help our kids deal with rejection in a healthy manner, and letting them obsess about being rejected at a college is not healthy.  [/quote]

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