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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My experience as a parent living in Bethesda since my kids were little - they're now teens, and one is in college:

A lot of parents I came across had one activity or academic thing their kids were good at, and were able to provide useful feedback for me as to which were the best instructors, what businesses to avoid, how to get a child to advance rapidly, etc. I appreciated that, and tried to pay it forward to parents of younger kids.

Since I'm not insecure about my parenting or my kids... I don't process these conversations as attacks, or mean competition, or anything negative at all. One of my children has special needs and needed a LOT of therapies and tutoring, and my other child is gifted. I've experienced the gamut, so I don't feel jealousy or shame or guilt or anything negative when someone else's child does better, or their parents boasts about them. I hope that others give me the benefit of the doubt when I share some of my kids' accomplishments.

After 18 years of doing this, I can reiterate that none of these parents seek to hurt you. They want to share their children's accomplishments and useful tips that have worked for them. I am always glad when someone is happy enough to share their kid's achievement with me - regardless of whether my kid has done better or worse. If you go through your parenting years thinking everyone is out to judge you and your kids, then you're going to make yourself miserable. Take things at face value, always assume good intentions.
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I don’t think the issue is that competitive parents are trying to hurt you. I never think “oh no, dies this mean I’m not a good parent? Is my kid not succeeding?” I just think it’s boring and bad conversation.

A weird thing some competitive parents do is try to give you advice even when you say you’re happy with something. This is very irritating and just makes me want to get away. I don’t want your advice on which travel soccer teams have the best coaches, because as I have said three times now, my kid’s interest in soccer is social only and we’re totally happy with rec league.

Competitive people are tedious and when they are competitive about their kids it’s often even worse because so many parenting topics are deadly dull.

Just read a book, talk about a tv show you liked, tell me about your non-parenting hobby, recount a funny story from your last family vacation. I do not want ti spend a child’s bday party discussing reading levels omg. Lighten tf up.[/quote]

PP you replied to.

I have to disagree with you, and many other people on this thread. I think it's just a matter of interest and time spent together. There are some parents who find it enjoyable to talk about parenting. They seek out like-minded parents and this is perhaps the group labeled as Tiger Parent or helicopter parent by others. Then there are others who, despite their loving their children equally well, prefer talking about something else, like current events or the latest book or movie.

But in the end, at dinner parties and get-togethers, most people talk about everything. There is enough time to broach all these subjects. So if you run into someone who talks about their kids, well, if you had more time together, you might find out they also love to talk about the latest Trump indictments or the Ukraine war or the finer points in Oppenheimer. Personally, I am that parent.

So I don't think it's fair to label others and judge them for eternity based on snippets of conversation.
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