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[quote=Anonymous]All these comments about how women have such high standards don't ring true to me because sometimes the issue is that my DH has such ridiculously high standards that it renders him unable to do things. Like when I clean the house, my goal is "done" not "perfect". If I don't feel like moving furniture around to vacuum, I don't. If I'm cleaning the kitchen and all I have time or energy for is dishes and wiping the counters down, that's all I do. And so on. Just do it.

Meanwhile, my DH laments that vacuuming is just so hard and takes so long, because he can't bear to do anything halfway. So the way he vacuums, or cleans the kitchen, or cleans the bathroom, does in fact take forever. So he just never does it.

His perfectionism is paralyzing with parenting, too, because he expects small children to be perfect, to need but one reminder, ever, to do something, and never again. He often gives up on basic parenting tasks like feeding our kids or getting them ready for bed because it doesn't go smoothly from the start, the complain or protest, they make mistakes and spill things. He will simply walk away from it because he can't control how it goes.

And he's not the only man like this. I know plenty of men who have unrealistically high standards for everything but limited patience. And these men aren't being controlled by wives who just won't let them do it their way. The opposite -- their wives are doing 90% of the childcare and cleaning because these tasks require flexibility, practicality, often the ability to multitask. These guys won't do that. And they'll claim it's because they won't do anything halfway, but really it's just an excuse to not do anything at all.

Men will find ANY excuse for why their wives need to do all the work they don't want to do. She's too controlling, she's more patient than I am, she's just better with the kids, she learned to do that when she was young, she enjoys it, etc. etc. etc.

It's a con, folks. Men know that for thousands of years, women performed free labor for men throughout their entire lives. It's a good gig for them, and they don't want to give it up. This is just another reason they are throwing up last to why. It's BS.[/quote]

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