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Reply to "s/o - Do you lose respect for someone if you've found out he or she has had an affair? "
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not really. People tend to "step out" once things have already gone south. [/quote] According to current research, this is not true. Cheaters are selfish people who will rationalize their actions in whatever way is most expedient. They do not want to think of themselves as bad people, so they blame their cheating on their spouses. They frequently check out emotionally first, leading their partners to do double the work of the marriage (which is futile). Or they treat their spouses terribly, which in fact does make "things go south," although again - they actually send things south. It is akin to saying "mistakes were made" instead of "I made mistakes." Cheaters refuse to own their actions. Bad marriages do no cause affairs, but affairs cause bad marriages.[/quote]
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