Reply to Sharing an ASD dx with child when you're not sure if you buy it

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why not tell him that he has an ASD diagnosis but that you guys aren't sure it's correct?  That way you all can keep your eyes out for whether it clicks or not, and your son will know you have his back?

An actual doctor with medical credentials gave this diagnosis and a dozen parents in this thread who haven't met OP's kid are disagreeing with the doctor.  Okay, but it seems like the doctor has reasons for the diagnosis that everybody here is just ignoring.  There was actual lack of back and forth conversation with the doctor (a lack that might not really be obvious in elementary school boy relationships).

There is so much resistance to the ASD diagnosis in this thread!  Two pages ago I literally typed out word for word what my 14 year old daughter advised, which was to tell the kid his diagnosis, that he deserves to know and think about it for himself.  We tried, kid, we tried!  *shrug*[/quote]

I wouldn’t advise opening that can of worms where any kid or adult or parent can simply negate a doctor or Dx. If you want compliance down the road, don’t start dismissing teachers and doctors and experts in front of an adhd or Asd kid.

Keep going with the adhd treatment and say they always monitor for comorbidities and one is ASD. Others are anxiety, depression. [/quote]

Right!  Far better to put aside diagnosis out of hand for now and not even tell the kid that a doctor diagnosed them with it -- that is not at all "simply negat[ing] a doctor or Dx" even though it actually fully withholds the info of the actual diagnosis from the child.

Your proposed solution of telling the child about comorbidities is better than nothing imho, but is still deficient.  The kid has a right to know of their actual diagnosis that they sat through testing for, and I have lived through this with my own kid, but wtf do I know?    [/quote]

pp you seem overly frustrated about this and taking it personally. I am sure you did the right thing for your child. 
bear in mind that what many of us are saying is that sharing an asd diagnosis might not help our kid better understand themselves. what we are saying is that because emotional regulation is not diagnostic of asd, then if you have a kid whose biggest issue is emotional regulation, it is not clear how you are helping the child by saying 'you have trouble regulating your emotions because you have autism' and then the kid reads about the definition of autism and is like - at no point is this diagnostic of autism. Now if you have a kid who is struggling due to distress around social relationships or external stimuli then yes you have an open shut case to tell them. my kid just gets emotional and a little ragey at the end of the day when meds wearing off - not sure how to pin that squarely enough on autism to share the dx - maybe! but you can see how some of us have a conundrum[/quote]

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