Reply to Parental time and activities as kids age

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Winter Swim is over.  So, this is a non-issue till the fall and you have time to look around for other groups and do summer tryouts.  Summer swim generally has multiple options and you can miss a day a week, no big deal.  And, if they are doing year round that includes summer, generally the majority of the swim times are very early in the morning.[/quote]I had to pick practice slots for my kid for winter swim two weeks ago.  It's totally possible that OP has to sign up now for the fall and make a decision which nights her DS will practice.  Any extra slots are filled by newcomer tryouts in June.  She has maybe 2-3 weeks until June tryouts for other teams.  She can't sort this out in September.

OP, I like the idea of the MWF practices and telling your DH to pick your son up at practice on Friday.  It seems more straightforward than trying to sort Saturday practices with your DS being at his dad's every other weekend.  It can be between your exDH and the coach if he can pull your DS early on Fridays.  I'd stay out of that.  [/quote]

How about talking to him and reworking the schedule if you are changing his visitation schedule?  Or, find a new team.  We don't sign up till the summer but if you are only doing 3 days a week swim, it is on a competitive group but it's not mandatory at that age they attend every single one.  We don't sign up till later in summer.  You don't stay out of something you set up and you set up Dad to fail and be the bad guy.  If you are changing the schedule you need to work it out.  You can offer to drive the kid to Dad's house after practice.[/quote]The kid wants to practice 3x a week to improve.  Missing a practice every other Friday only works out to 2.5 days a week of swimming.

I'm also not sure where all these posters live that finding a swim team that is located within a reasonable distance, has perfect practice times to fit Dad's schedule, and has openings is super easy. That's certainly not true in thr DMV.  It also would require that DS switch teams, coaches, and friends every year to search for a team that fits Dad's schedule.  None of that is easy or possible.

From what OP has shared, Dad doesn't want to pick up DS from practice on Friday 30 minutes later than his usual time because (1) he doesn't want to wait and (2) traffic may get worse for his ride home.  But you know what?  Picking kids up from activities at annoying times is part of parenting.  And this doesn't even sound especially inconvenient.

Sure, OP can consider flexing the visitation schedule if Dad will have a conversation, but if he wont consider any options, I'd just sign DS up for three nights a week and let Dad sort Fridays with the coach.  It's part of parenting and only 30 minutes.[/quote]

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