Reply to Parental time and activities as kids age

Forum Index » Parenting -- Special Concerns

Reply to "Parental time and activities as kids age"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Instead of sitting in traffic for an hour, why not attend a sports practice for one kid while hanging out, talking with the other kid?

They would have less traffic and kids would get to have activities. If all they do is drive an hour and sleep on Tuesday night, why doesn’t he just take the kids to activities and dinner Tuesday night and let them sleep in their own beds?

He could also get them Friday after activities and keep them until Monday morning - replacing your Wednesday am routine. [/quote]

OP here. I agree this would be logical. He doesn’t want to give up time with either kid. He also wants activity free time. It’s frustrating. I offered the Sunday evening in place of Tuesday night or friday activities. So he could wait until practice is over Friday and also keep them until Monday morning. His issue with Friday is he doesn’t want to sit in more traffic and apparently 30 minutes makes a difference. [/quote]

Sounds like he thinks the kids are 5 yo and he will be the fun Disney Dad and the kids are there to stroke his ego.

Why doesn’t he want them to do some sport or arts well and take strong lessons? Weird. [/quote]

No, it sounds like he wants to spend the little time he has with the kids and not sitting in the car at practice and not spending time with them.[/quote]

It's called parenting time for a reason.  Because the job during the time is to be a parent, which includes the fun parts, and the less fun parts like sitting in the car, and helping with homework, and putting their needs first.

The kids needs should be at the center of the decision making.  Not the parent's desire for a playmate.   [/quote]

Parenting time is when you share custody.  Visitation is when you only get your kids every other weekend and maybe a few hours during the week.  So, it's not reasonable to have Dad spend no 1-1 time with the kids as you over-schedule them and schedule on his time.  He decides what happens on his time, you on yours.  You know the schedule and you choose a team and times that work for the schedule.  [b]This is not competitive swim at a serious level if it's just 3 afternoons/evenings a week.[/b]   You are not a parent if you have every other weekend visitation and you get no say in your child's life or schedule.  As the custodial parent you don't get to dictate what happens during visits.  You can request it, but you don't get to dictate it.[/quote]

And how is a kid supposed to even get to a competitive level if one of their parents insists they can NEVER EVER practice on "their time?"[/quote]

You address that issue when it becomes an issue.  At this point, they aren't on a high level.  Mom can choose other times but has chosen Dad's time, which is very limited.  If he agrees, great, but if he doesn't she needs to try to change the visit schedule to one that works for him or drive the kid to Dad's house as a compromise.  Or, find a different team.  There are lots of options here.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics