Reply to 2023 - Going rate for nanny share

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]PP, can you tell us more about what you do not like in your nanny's personality? I have been interviewing a few nannies and they all seem to be hiding their personalities, what if, when I hire one, I do not like her personally? does it even affect anything? What should I be looking for?[/quote]

Sure, just so you know, we’re a pretty laid back family and the nannies we loved were similar, they just enjoyed us, they enjoyed spending time with the kids, playing with them. Most of them would tidy up after themselves and the kids but we didn’t expect more. They always took the kids out and just had fun, showed them new dances, helped them through tricky social situations/friendships, taught them fun songs. We’d always ask them to stay for dinner or take them out for treats and they always seemed to love to hang out. When they are back in town they ask to see us and the kids.

Our most recent Nannies spend way less time just playing and enjoying the kids. They’ll buy crafts and then expect the kids to just do them by themselves. We constantly see them on the phone or computer, the way they talk to the kids feels really condescending, constantly asking for raises, more leave, despite taking tons of time off. They seem to want to focus on cleaning or laundry ( which we tell them not to focus on) rather than just playing with the kids. Don't get me wrong, I do like having laundry done, but i much prefer someone who  my kids feel happy with and love, not someone they dread showing up in the morning. I prefer someone who is not constantly asking for money, or using our credit card to buy a million crafts a week, as well as going out for lunch constantly, and the always claiming she need more money. She admits she likes to shop. And she’s scaled back but this is still insane. She was initially spending upwards of $60/day on lunch outings with my 4 yo and infant. Crazy.

I work from home 2-3 days a week and I hate having to deal with her. I don’t even know why she is always there, we bought ALL the museum passes (at her request), we have all the activity passes, we live like 6 blocks from a great library and multiple playgrounds but she is ALWAYS there. I even tell her to leave the napping baby with me and take my older kids out. But she still ends up just hanging out at our place, insists my older kids take an hour of quiet times, but I’m sure she drags it on longer. My so. Says he feels so lonely.  She’s hung over a lot, and I know this bc she forgets to leave us our car keys which have Apple tags on them (she is aware of this) and I can see that she’s at the bar. Also I have a mutual friend on instagram that sees all of her bar hopping pics and sends them to me. I have no issues with the nannies drinking in their own time as long as it doesn’t effect work, but it’s annoying when it makes her irritable. She actually told me once she was going to let my 4 yo watch tv bc she was so hungover. Then she gets upset when I don’t give her a bonus!

I recommend a trial period, before you get her on the books, to just see how she treats you and the kids. But otherwise, no clue. This one has exhausted me and I’m just done. None of them are worth this exorbitant new price tag they are all expecting [/quote]

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