Reply to I got an email telling me my daughter is a mean girl.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The description of your DD as a popular girl who is frustrated with expectations that she is friends with everyone is sending up red flags for me. Like Gretchen Wieners cluelessly saying I can’t help it that I’m popular. [/quote]

OP here, and I will not lie, I also see those comment is a slightly different light.

I am inclined not to respond to the email, so I perhaps the best course is to talk to my daughter more generally about the issue?

FWIW, I am not ruling out the possibility this is true. [b]But it’s my kid, so it’s really tough to think it could be true.[/b] I feel like I have always emphasized kindness and not gossiping. [/quote]

Push past this.  I see this blind spot in so many parents.  [/quote]

NP.  So?  Even a mean girl should be loved unconditionally by her mother.  And at 17, this is not something that OP is going to fix.  It's going to have to come from the DD.  [/quote]

Are you kidding?  Yes love your kid unconditionally, but also you view their actions clear-eyed and you have real conversations with them and hold them accountable kindly.  You're doing ZERO favors if you just gloss over opportunities to hold up a mirror for your child.  It's not a lecture.  Get into a conversation and ask thoughtful questions.  [/quote]

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