Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
»
Tweens and Teens
Reply to "How do you stay neutral when spouse gets locked in power struggle with tween?"
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Wow. Dh and I always stand by each others decisions. Always. Admittedly we don’t disagree often, but still dh is my partner in life. I have his back first and always. [/quote] No way. You chose to have this life. Your first responsibility is to your kid, as they are a minor and under your protection. Should they have low self esteem, anxiety, depression - as adults - that almost always is on you and what you failed to provide or protect them from. I knew a lot of spouses like you - and let me tell you, as adults the kids distance themselves from *both* parents. One for being a jerk, and the other for being silent.[/quote] Meaning, there are *many* marriages that the couple just shows a unified front with the kids. But in too many, I see one parent being very authoritarian in their parenting style, and the other one acquiescing, just to keep up the unified front. Or perhaps they actually agree. I don't know about PP specifically, perhaps their disagreements are minor, and perhaps their styles are very similar in parenting. But I was taking issue with the comment that "DH is my partner in life. I have his back first and always". I fundamentally disagree. You have your kids back first. Because *you* brought them into this world. And should there ever be a time when your spouse goes overboard, with authoritarian parenting, potentially exposing them to emotional abuse or neglect, it is absolutely your duty to step in and protect your child. And yes, I am reacting, because I see this play out in my own life many times. I have two siblings who are extremely interested in maintaining this unified front with their spouses over what is best for their kids. The result is that one child is being routinely verbally abused (because mom cannot contradict dad), and the other set of nephews are spiraling into anxiety. [/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics