Reply to Daughter wants to pick a bad influence roommate

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Wow, three pages without anyone telling op to land the helicopter.  Her dd will find plenty of “bad influence” friends in college if she so choses, and op will have no control over it.[/quote]

Sure, that's great in theory -- but when you're putting down $50k a year don't you want to give your kid boundaries and not use this as a time to learn expensive lessons?[/quote]

Good luck with that, once op’s dd is on campus and the family car drives off, she can and will hang out with whomever she choses, including this high school friend, regardless of whether they are roommates.[/quote]

Yeah but living in that environment is so different from hanging out with the friend. The DD will have control over when she wants to see that friend and booze or do whatever. And I also understand that when you sign up to live with a stranger you might be paired with someone who also parties a lot, but the DD will much more easily be able to stand up for herself without all the of past history of a childhood friend. There's also a weird dynamic of standing up to the childhood friend and worrying that friend will report back to their mutual high school friends that DD is being a jerk/ loser/ whatever. It's just cleaner to go with a stranger and walk away if it doesn't work.[/quote]

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