Reply to I think my tween needs to lose weight. How to handle?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]I suspect OP weighs less than her growing son and is afraid that his body reflects poorly on her. [/b]

My mom was like this when I was 5'4 and 120 pounds as a young teen - she was 5'4 and 105. She thought I was fat and would just get fatter and fatter. (At 50, I am 5'4 and 115 pounds, but thanks for screwing up my body image, Mom!)

If your son is self-conscious about how his body looks right now, talk to him about how puberty looks different on everyone - he is not the only 11 year old with a pudgy middle and its perfectly normal for him to be built like that. Don't play muffin police or cut off food.  Make sure his brothers arent bullying him over it. My kids ate more as tweens before their big growth spurts than they did as teens.[/quote]

NO! (OP here). I am not worried about how it reflects on me. I want him to be happy and healthy. The American Academy of Pediatrics just recently came out with a big push to be more aggressive in fighting obesity or overweight status with kids/teens. I know my son is not obese or perhaps even technically overweight right now. But he's definitely heavier than most of his friends and I know it bothers him, and I'm just trying to figure out how to help. My top priority is to NOT give him a complex.

And for what it's worth I am not some weight-obsessed skinny mom. I'm solidly average, always have been, and am fine with that.[/quote]

So, I totally understand where the AAP is coming from on this issue (I’m sure most agree) BUT we are just trying to tell you that your son’s pattern is SO SO COMMON among normal healthy kids. Suddenly getting a tad bit chubby at age 11 is so so normal. Honestly I am surprised he is self conscious about it based on what you posted- he sounds daily average. My son is 12 and 5’1” 90lbs and very slender- most of his similar height friends outweigh him by 10-20lbs for sure and look a bit more sturdy than he does- but definitely healthy and not overweight. I think it is a puberty thing (my son really hasn’t started and I assume many others have). Boys tend to get thicker with puberty, not a new thing at all. [/quote]

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