Reply to How would you react: DH says he's "done working."

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "How would you react: DH says he's "done working.""

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op, my military dh just retired last month.  His last assignment ended in August though, so he’s been home since then. He had a brush with a mid-life crisis.  He drank like a fish and I thought we were headed for divorce.  If the opportunity had presented itself, I’m sure he would have cheated.   He seems to have righted himself a bit, but is still unemployed and not yet looking for work.  We can’t afford for him to stay this way for all that long though.  Maybe a year, but if he’s unemployed this time next year we’ll have to move to a lower COL location.

Just putting that out there to say I feel you.   In your shoes, I’d go out for a quiet dinner, just the two of you, and approach this with an attitude of care and curiosity, and express concern for him.  It’s okay to also say that this is clearly not working for him, and as a follow on from that, it’s not working for you and the rest of the family.   He may genuinely not know where to start looking for a job at this point.  He may be afraid of rejection if he tries.

There may be something deeper going on, something about his childhood, his parents, his dad’s relationship with work, parents time in retirement, something.  See what you can figure out.  I think it’s okay to be open with him that the status quo is not okay.  [/quote]

This has been going on for FIVE YEARS, not one month. I assuming the OP has tried the nice, understanding route. Really, it is time to just get out.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics