Reply to How would you react: DH says he's "done working."

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'd tell him he has three choices (if you're OK with all of them):

(i) Get a full time job.
(ii) Become an actual stay at home parent, who proactively takes care of everything (including the mental load).  Cooking (including shopping and meal planning, transporting kids, scheduling appointments (and remembering to schedule the appointments), etc.  
(iii) divorce.  (Not that you're looking forward to this, but the situation you describe is untenable.  He isn't doing anywhere close to half of the household tasks, he is barely working, and he's unpleasant to boot.  The pension doesn't entitle him to stop working forever, it is a security blanket for the family, and maybe mans that he has less pressure to maximize his earning potential.)

In order to accomplish the first two choices, though, it seems clear that he needs to get his mental and emotional health in order.  [/quote]

Nix no. 2. Choices should be 1 or 3.[/quote]

That's really OP's choice.  Plenty of families have one full-time SAHP.  But that parent actually has to do the entire job, not just dabble in it.  [/quote]

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