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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Why doesn't my wife like me?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is not a real question and I don't want an answer. But I am a socially awkward guy who is successful. By no means do I think I'm perfect, but I would love to come in from work one day and hear that I did something well. Does that ever happen to men? I come home and try to spend time with her but she always tells me she doesn't want to hear about our direct care about my interests whether that be books or TV shows or games, parenting whatever. No-go. Instead, she'll point out things I do wrong that I guess embarrass her and focus on that, telling me how to improve. But then I improve and [b]create another dependency [/b]and the cycle repeats. It's frustrating because I feel like she married this nerdy dude and she knew he was nerdy. Now she's trying to change me for social acceptance, and meanwhile nerdy me feels isolated. [/quote] What does this mean? [/quote] She says "you bring your Rubik's cube too often to parties" I'll get a notebook and bring it to the party. I'm social but at dull moments I'll write in it, just thoughts, maybe a question, maybe song lyrics So later I'll see her and she criticizes the notepad. Fast forward and I have something else. But these fidget things help with social anxiety and she seems to be against them. Maybe more some than others, but why does she get to be the social police for me. [/quote] Parties are to socialize with other human beings. How can you do that if you are alone writing in your notebook or playing with your Rubik's cube those acts mean you don't want to be bothered and single to others you want to stay to yourself? [/quote] The problem is I'm awkward. I'm always going to be awkward. There's no button to press that will magically give me the right joke to say or the right inspirational speech to give. No I ask weird questions and tell weird stories, I embarrass myself quite often. I enjoy sitting and reading books. I have no problem talking about those books but sometimes I dive too deep into the fictional world that people get mad at my questions. I went to a social gathering last week where we heard a few stories. In my head I had about a dozen questions a minute go through my head that sometimes jokes, sometimes legit questions but maybe offensive, and sometimes legit questions but questions that I can ask. The other thing. I can't disguise my face. So when I have a question that I don't want to ask, I may say "no" to myself or frown or shake my head. But that's not socially appropriate. So I sat there and fidgeted with my phone and played it off, but this is not socially appropriate either. I don't stay to myself. I go to be by myself to re-group. Its like taking a pit stop on a run, except for me a bottle of water is a Rubik's cube. Going back to that conversation after solving the puzzle, my mind is a lot calmer. Its not throwing out as many questions, as it is partially thinking about the solution to the cube. As a result I'm normally able to participate in these conversations easier and make less of a fool of myself. [/quote]
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