Reply to DH (WH) about to be hospitalized for suicide ideation- what do I need to know?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Cancelling or postponing a business trip because your spouse is in the hospital is not sacrificing your career.[/quote]

I think OP is in understandable fear that canceling her first trip after a promotion looks bad. And frankly it will to some. But if her DH gets hospitalized, she needs to treat it the same as if he'd been in a terrible car crash and was hospitalized -- who would leave in that circumstance? No one. It might be a short-term ding with a few managers at work but not with any decent manager. [/quote]

I disagree. I’m the BTDT poster.

She is being manipulated. The more his emotional manipulation causes OP to change your plans the more he learns that his manipulation works to his favor

I don’t think she should go on her trip for career reasons. She needs to go on her trip to show her husband. His mental health issues are his and his only and she will not stop her life for him.

To people who have not dealt with this, this might seem cold, but this is actually a form of treatment. You can’t compare this situation to a stroke. Just like you would not treat a mentally ill person with the same treatment plan as he would somebody with a stroke[/quote]

Like an earlier PP who replied to you, I'll note that you are projecting your own past experience hard here. I'm sorry if your spouse was manipulative. But you're advising OP to proceed on the assumption her DH is trying to manipulate her--basically, you are telling her to assume he's [i]faking[/i] a mental health crisis. Do you not see the risk you're telling her to take, if it turns out he is suicidal?

OP is not a mental health professional and is in no position right now to decide that her DH is faking. Neither are you. The potential cost to their family if he's [i]not[/i] faking is so incredibly high. This is why mental health professionals tend to take suicidal statements at face value to start with. Leave it to the doctors to figure all this out re: OP's DH. [/quote]

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