Reply to We agreed I would host Easter…now MIL is balking

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Good for your husband. You enjoy not traveling and hosting whomever shows up. [b]And then you can feel free to agree to travel to them for Thanksgiving, but maybe “balk” a month out and let her see how that feels.[/b][/quote]

Yeah, that rarely works, because the people who are [b]immature[/b] enough to bait and switch are by definition [b]too self-absorbed[/b] to learn their lesson when someone does it to them. They'll just have "proof" that they were the victim all along. I've seen it happen too many times.[/quote]

And there it is, the extremely sweeping harsh judgment and painting MIL as a terrible person.  This is one situation in which the MIL is not acting exactly as she "should."  No need to make it more than that.[/quote]

You're the one exaggerating, PP. I never said MIL was a terrible person. My own mother is like this. She is self-absorbed and immature. She's nice otherwise! It blows your mind, right, but people are complex and both good and bad. You've got to learn to manage them, and I've personally experienced that with some of these people, mirroring their actions just doesn't work, because they don't see themselves like that. They'd rather be in denial.

[/quote]

You're right, you didn't say MIL was a terrible person.  You said she was an immature self-absorbed person who plays the victim and "baits and switches."  You have somehow derived what "type of person" she is and assumed you know how she would react.  All I know from OP's few sentences is that in this instance a person who has grown accustomed to hosting agreed not to host and then wanted to reraise the issue later.[/quote]

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