Reply to How to explain to Ils that parents don’t want to share Christmas

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "How to explain to Ils that parents don’t want to share Christmas "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My parents would have been like your parents OP: would have graciously dealt with iLs but their joy would have been sucked out - and mine too as I know they were being imposed on by your ILs crashing. Have DH proactively say - ‘we’re spending Christmas w/Jane’s family this year. Lets find a weekend before or after that trip to celebrate with you.’ IF they suggest traveling there again he has to be firm over and over again if needed. It is an intrusion and just because they’re disappointed doesn’t mean they’re right.[/quote]

This is the correct answer. [/quote]

Op - yes last time they came I think my family dealt with it but their feeling is that it was non optimum. 
Basically in laws feel like others on this thread do that everyone and their dog should be welcome on xmas. 
Parents feel like they want alone time with us and we should swap off years. 
I don’t really care either way - hosting the in laws where my parents will be is kind of a hassle. Christmas in general is kind of a hassle. All the hosting and expectations and work - eh. But we don’t have that choice bc I am not the grinch and kids still young [/quote]
You don’t care either way, but what does your husband want?

If he feels strongly that he wants his parents included every year, then our advice to you will differ than in the case where he wants your parents’ wishes to be upheld.

[/quote]

Um, what about the feelings of OP’s parents—you know, the owners of the home that is being crashed?!?! [/quote]

They might not go to that house in the first place if DH feels strongly that he wants his family included each year.  They have the choice not to fly out to OP’s parents for Christmas.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics