Reply to Elderly in-laws refuse to sell house that needs $200k of work, are out of money, can’t get loan

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Reply to "Elderly in-laws refuse to sell house that needs $200k of work, are out of money, can’t get loan"

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[quote=Anonymous]You cannot give them a substantial amount of money.  You need to focus on your own goals - homeownership, retirement and college savings.  Think about your children.  If you fail to fund your own retirement are you going to expect your children to do it when they have to pay off student loans cause you also didn't pay for college?  Don't push this problem onto them.

If you ILs are adamant then let them stay in the house.  Do not pay for major repairs on a house that will be a teardown when its finally sold.  If it needs a new roof but they can't afford it then they can live with the old one.  They need to take ownership of their decisions.  You can give them small amounts of money but I generally think its better to pay certain bills so you know where the money goes.  For example you could add them to your cell phone plan or set up some kind of regular grocery delivery.  If they start complaining your only response is that you will help them look for another place to live.  And at their age you should be looking at independent living that can transition to assisted living.  Don't look for another house, the reality is they are past that point.

FWIW, my ILs are also making poor choice concerning staying in their home.  Its more for health reasons than financial reasons but we can't force them out so we're just waiting.  There will be some big event - probably a fall or other health emergency that will change the situation.  It sucks to just sit and wait for that but that's where we're at.  [/quote]

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