Reply to Both my husband and I have no friends

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Both my husband and I have no friends"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I could relate to a lot of this, OP. We moved to a different state years ago. Things started off well before the pandemic. We knew a few people when we moved here, my husband had a good friends we'd see a lot with their kids, and over time. We also made a few new friends in our neighborhood. We had get togethers and were invited to dinners. Then the pandemic hit. Some of our friends moved away or became very introverted. It took two years to finally reconnect with one of DH's friends even though they lived less than an hour away. DH also seemed very comfortable with pandemic life. He never really cared for the office and really embraced working from home full time. So did some of his colleagues. We used to see a few of them often; in fact, most of them live very close by. That said, we stopped getting together. I think a lot of people just turned inward and became accustomed to staying home, and perhaps become more selective when it came to deciding who to spend time with. Having kids of different ages and genders seemed to become the deciding factor. I've come to the conclusion that some "mom friend" relationships are circumstantial, even transactional.

So now, here we are three years post-pandemic with a very small social circle. We're probably going to move in a year. I really don't feel like I'm going to miss much at this point. I do hope that we're able to find new friends through work. I'll most likely change jobs when we move. Maybe we'll meet people through school, the neighborhood, and join some local clubs, help out with maintaining a local park, who knows. I do think it came to be very hard at this stage of our lives, mid-40s with kids, to find friends. Depending on where you live, people can be cliquish and unwilling to invite new people into their circle. Carolyn Hax had a recent feature about a woman who said her husband turns off people so it's hard for them to find friends. OP, I get the sense based on what you'e written that you'd know whether your spouse turns off people (is he bombastic, racist, a substance abuser, a cad who gropes other women at BBQs). If not, I would just say yes, it's hard out there to connect with people, especially after so many people reduced their social circle, formed pods, and moved away from the office where many of us once connected easily with others. I don't know what else to tell you. I don't know what else to tell myself. Go back to church? [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics