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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]MIL died last year.  FIL is likely going to remarry.  We are thrilled for him and we like his girlfriend. 
He is 79, girlfriend is 73.  She was never married and has no children and no family outside of a brother she is "estranged" from and probably some cousins. 
We have the only grandchildren. My husband has a sister who is a single, law partner.  No kids.

We do not want or need FILs money but would like it (or a portion of it) to go to our children as opposed to whatever his new wife-to-be does with it
after her death (We imagine she will outlive him----and then when she passes will she give it to our kids? donate to a church? will it go to her estranged brother?)

She is financially secure (was a professor for many years, owns her own home, etc). 
FIL wants whatever we want.  He adores the grandchildren.

Thoughts on how to proceed prior to his marriage?  We are having very open conversations with this (he is super open about talking about it). 
Thx![/quote] SIL and DH should inherit equally. DH can ask that his father bypass him and give his portion directly to grandchildren.

Friend is going through this where parents left 25% to their son, 25% to their daughter, and 25% to each of the grandchildren. The son has no children and is mad as hell. It has destroyed the brother and sister relationship. [/quote]

Wow the brother sucks. First he failed to respect that his father had his own relationship with his grandkids and then he ruined his relationship with his sister because he was greedy. If any of my kids suggested I shouldn’t give inheritances directly to my grandkids I would write that child out of the will entirely. [/quote]

DP. Most estate attorneys steer clients away from giving more to one siblings family than another. It’s not fair. I’m childless and my parents set my trust up so that if I don’t have kids, my remaining portion goes to my nieces and nephews or charity I choose but I’m the only and primary beneficiary during my lifetime. That’s fair. And standard. I have one sibling with one kid who very much supports this and another with four kids who initially tried to get separate inheritance for the grandkids so that her family would get more. Luckily the estate attorney explained it to her and she backed down.[/quote]

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