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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have 3 and my husband is a big law partner.   I had my first at almost 34.  
I think 2 is 3x as hard as 1 (2 kids to manage plus the interaction between them.). I think 3 kids is 6x as hard as 1.  (Again, more interpersonal dynamics to manage.). Mine are each 2.5 years apart so they are never really in the same phase.

What I did not anticipate is how much work they are as tweens and younger teens.  Even if they only do rec sports that’s 2 practices a week (each) plus a game or two on weekends.  They probably will have at least one more activity—music or a club at school.

No one wants to work for you when you have middle school kids — the nannies all want cute little kids that they can mold to their own system of doing things.

Plus you need to monitor their school work somewhat, which is really challenging, and make a lot of decisions about other issues — how down is depressed and you need to find a therapist?  Are these grades bad enough you need to think about a tutor?  Or maybe there’s an online program that will help them understand algebra 2 because God knows I’ve forgotten it.  It takes more time to shop for them because they all have their own odd preferences.  Etc. etc.  Thank God my husband has sort of an atypical firm life and can leave early regularly to help manage the sports stuff.   It would be physically impossible for me to do it all.  And the older they get the less likely you can carpool because while little kids just do activities with their friends, tweens and teens are unlikely to make the same teams or whatever that their friends do, and the other kids in the activities may not live anywhere near you.

Im saying all this because when I was your age I was focused on the slog of parenting babies and what I could handle at 35.  I was not at all thinking about how exhausted I’d be at 50 with all the work that these kids generate.  [quote]Teens generate way more laundry than babies because they sweat like Teamsters and there’s all the workout clothes, multiple towels for showers, etc.  [/quote]And they eat so much!  And who is going to stay up to pick them up at parties that end at 11 or 12?

I’m not telling you not to do it, but I’m just saying the babies are the least of it.  I would take three babies in a heartbeat! [/quote]

that's why you teach your kids to do their own laundry by age 10 - my parents never touched my laundry (except to complain if I haden't taken it out of the dryer in a timely manner)  when i was a teen.  Plus I cooked dinner some days as a teen.   Some work is self created and not inherently part of having teenage children. 
[/quote]

This is us too.  Three kids.  They all do their own laundry and cook/make their own breakfasts and lunches.  If they don’t like what we’re having for dinner or if thyey need to eat early because of evening sports or activities, then they make their own dinners.  We taught them how to shop for groceries and bag them at age 9 or 10 and they help now as teens.  It’s not always a slog when they’re older.[/quote]

DP with three kids, who also do their laundry and get meals as needed, etc: you and I both know it’s a lot of work to get them to this independent place.  It’s not a slog when they’re older IF you put in the time and effort when they’re younger - and are fortunate to have kids who can learn these tasks without a ton of ongoing supports.[/quote]

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