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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why do so many people post these threads on DCUM? You know damn well all the maladjusted broken people will come out of the woodwork pressuring you be the worst possible version of a DD you can be, instead of helping you deal with your mother the way she is without suffering yourself. Telling you to cut her off instead of helping you have compassion. To only focus on your own feelings and needs instead of the feelings and needs of an elderly person WHO GAVE BIRTH TO YOU AND RAISED YOU. As if you're somehow not capable of being a normal, decent person. As if in your moment of weakness they're urging you "Do it!! Just do it!! Be your worst self! Follow your basest instincts!!!" instead of telling you that you feel bad now but it will get better, that you can handle it, etc.

It's so predictable and disgusting. The people who were raised in a normal way and are healthy get drowned out or don't bother with these threads. You're just getting the worst possible advice, OP. But I'm sure you expected that when you posted.[/quote]

They always seem to crawl out from under the bridge. You chose to have children and they are adorable. Their sweet little baby smiles are what keep you going changing diapers and dealing withe the bewitching hour. As they grow and mature their are so many rewards that keep you going through the hard times.

Nobody chose to have an abusive parent crying and screaming to manipulate. No cute smiles to keep you going and the period of neediness often lasts far longer than babyhood and toddlerhood. And they get worse and more abusive.

You poster need to deal with you own demons. This seems to be personal for you. I see the tactics in your writing-the attempts at shaming and guilt-tripping. Your insults are noticed. Here is some advice poster- you are not going to get anywhere with this. Ayre it may have worked for a while, but long term shaming, guilt tripping, insulting and gaslighting make people run for the hills. Get help, before it's too late. I am engaging with you right now, but that will stop. Soon others will drift as well. The best way to deal with abusive behavior when someone won't change is to stop enabling, stop reasoning and distance yourself.[/quote]

I'm trying to encourage people to be their best selves while they still have a chance to. I already posted about our neighbor who killed herself because her adult children cut her off. If you don't care about the parents in these threads, care about the damning effects of their adult children by choosing this route.. Adult children are ADULTS, no longer children, and the suffering THEY cause in this world counts too.

Be careful with how you treat people. You are responsible for the pain and trauma your put out there in the world, too. It will haunt you. Be your best self. God gave you this situation as your cross to bear, and you can beat it will kindness and compassion if you chose to. Or not. That's YOU.[/quote]

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