Reply to How are kids doing post divorce?

Forum Index » Parenting -- Special Concerns

Reply to "How are kids doing post divorce?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Divorce has an impact.  It's often generational.  Many people posting saying their kids are doing great likely only look at the surface level impact or superficial things.

I've lived through my parent divorcing 3 times. My parent would say I'm fine.  I would say im fine overall.  My approach to relationships and people has been affected.  I recognize that things don't last forever.  I never went into my own marriage thinking it would last.  Things don't have a sense of permanence to me.  I'm not as trusting.  My spouses parents were married 40 years.  He went into marriage a lot more optimistic than I did.

I'm a successful adult with a job, home and I travel

Someone from a broken home is likely to divorce or never marry.  Their kids continue the cycle most times.

I'm not anti divorce but obviously people saying there is no impact are in denial.
[/quote]

This.  My life is not ruined.  I'm "fine".  "Children are resilient" stems from a study that said children of divorce had no *lasting* psychological damage *as adults*.  But that doesn't mean it was easy for me as a teenager or that it's easy for me now.  It's a giant hassle, especially as my parents grow old, and they have financial problems and failed second marriages that they would not have had if they had stayed married.  Unhappily in your first marriage is better than unhappily in your second or third marriage IMO.

Now, when I was younger I would have put on my bravado and said flippantly that the divorce was for the best and everything's great.  But that's only because I didn't fully understand the long-term impact and what it would be like for me as an adult.  I just don't have that secure foundation that people have when they come from a happy intact family.  And the logistical problems are getting worse.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics