Reply to How to help kids not date/marry people who trash talk their folks

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mom once told me to try to avoid marrying someone who doesn't get along with his family. She said either that person is right and you'd be marrying into a family with difficult people OR the person you are dating is the difficult person. Either way it's bad news.

It was pretty good advice![/quote]

+100 People on DCUM who are practically crowing about how they are estranged from family, or worse, encourage others to become estranged, don't realize that they are announcing that they are damaged goods. I hope my kids avoid those people, too.[/quote]

You’re lucky to come from such privilege. Not all of us are so fortunate. I guess we did a crap job of choosing which family to be born into and we deserve what we got, or something like that. As much as I resent you calling me damaged goods for having the bad luck of being born into a poor, abusive family, I don’t wish you ill or even wish that you learn from experience how the negative actions of your family can affect you even though you have no control of them, especially during childhood. I do hope you find more empathy though. Maybe someday someone close to you can share how they rose above adversity and you’ll realize that escaping cycles of abuse, poverty, or addiction is a good thing, not a bad thing. [/quote]

You are describing me. What I don't do is brag about how horrible my family was, and urge others on DCUM to see themselves as victims and to dwell on every bad thing about their relatives. Funny thing is, those people have ZERO empathy for their big, bad relatives -- they happily "grey rock" and shut them out, and tell others on DCUM to do the same. That's the exact opposite of empathy.[/quote]

You truly need therapy. Leave other people alone and let them deal with their issues. You are likely someone who would tell people who are being abused to shut up. People like you allow the Sanduskys etc of the world to continue their abuse.[/quote]

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