Reply to I'm having a midlife crisis, looking for advice

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The most unhappy years for women are late 40s. It's just life, kids, aging parents, hormones. It gets easier in the 50s. Having a sense of humor and rolling with the changes is the way to go. Your health is your wealth more so now than ever.[/quote]

This hasn't been true for me. I'm finding my 60s difficult. My kids are fledging and after decades of dealing with issues with the schools and other adults regarding my child with sns, I feel worn out and cynical. I'm not spiritual/religious and won't find that helpful. Like a poster above alluded to I'm missing the older women around me who were good friends, gave great advice, weren't prone to being competitive or insulting. Everyone around me is younger and seems petty and competitive. So many older friends have died and I feel sad about it. I moved away from many of them when my kids were small and lost touch now to find many are dead. My mom has managed to live a very long life and I feel sad for her. She's lived long enough to see different generations of her friends die and now her sisters gone and she doesn't really have anyone. The indignity of life is that as she becomes more dependent upon others, they aren't there to help. She also isn't comfortable driving and that is killing her social life. I see that this is the future for most of us. We used to have large family gatherings with extended family but through the years people moved across the world and we've lost touch. I miss how life used to be. I miss how nice shopping used to be. Does anyone else remember how good clothes at Woodies used to smell? How nice the stores were? How putting up Christmas decorations wasn't construed as a political statement?

I'm shocked by how stuck in nostalgia I am.  I'm not 80. It feels like the world has changed too much for me.[/quote]

I could have written this and I am only 44. I miss my upbringing, my family connections of the older generation - only my mom seems to be left and she is having dementia. I miss her, she was my emotional support system and now she’s not anymore and needs me. Kids are young teen/tween. DH just emerged from decade long unemployment but his job is limited to a year. Who know what happens then. I have a good income but never thought that I would have to miss out on all family stuff because I would be the only breadwinner. My life is awful and to top it off I have a chronic condition that keeps deteriorating and who knows how long I can manage it. I didn’t expect this from life at all. It’s been downhill and I am not even old yet.[/quote]

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