Reply to Did you feel better after going no-contact with your mom?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I've posted before, but relate to so much. Right now I am low contact, but was happier mostly when no contact. I don't feel the need to tell people other than to say "we aren't close" or "we are very different" if people ask. It took many many years trying many many strategies and getting lots of therapy. I found once I went no contact and then accepted very low when she reached out, I didn't need therapy because there wasn't all this negative noise in my life. There is absolutely no benefit to me having my mother in my life. She has endless expectations of what i should be doing for her. She had no empathy when my husband had a near death experience and was hospitalized and took a long time to recover. It was al me, me me!!!

I will say holidays are hard in that everyone talks about big family gatherings. I have so many trauma memories of holiday meltdowns that even if we see friends I feel like holidays just trigger me and make me sad. If I could stand holiday travel I'd try to escape with my family.

The only person who truly loved me in my family was my dad and he is gone. [/quote]

I forgot to mention it also makes my heart hurt when I see how lovely my friends' parents are and when those parents are kind to me. I feel like I don't deserve the kindness and the little girl in me just wants to hide and cry. I lost it when my daughter asked why she couldn't have a grandmother like that. (DH's mom is a peace of work too).[/quote]

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