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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I'm sorry you are at your wits end.  There's a lot going on here.  In the first place, it sounds like your kids are kind of out of control because you aren't doing any controlling, and you blame your lack of control on the death of a family member.  Look, my father died during COVID, and my husband's grandma and uncle.  But we had to keep going through the motions to keep the train moving.  You need to too. For your children.

Please buy this notepad.  It's amazing.  It's tear off type sheets that you can scribble down your To-Dos, then cross them out when they are complete.  I love how I can just tear off the page and start over if I want.  I use pencil so I can erase if needed.  Start writing down things you know you need to do.  And do them.  Maybe 1 item would be booking therapy with someone who specializes in parenting issues.  Maybe a 2nd item would be a therapist for your kid.  If the child is very young, maybe a BT specialist (behavioral therapy).  I hope this helps.  Hope you get out of this rut!

https://www.amazon.com/Erin-Condren-Designer-Planning-Notepad/dp/B07JHWMD7M/ref=dp_prsubs_1?pd_rd_i=B07JHWMD7M&psc=1[/quote]

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