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[quote=Anonymous]I’m the OP. I went away because I felt judged. It’s hard to explain the dynamics unless you’re in them. I contacted my mom today after three weeks because were going on a family vacation. (She was invited but declined. She has stomach issues and headaches and is afraid to go too far from home, which I understand and am sympathetic to…although then she also says we never invite her on family vacations and choose places she can’t go. We’re renting a house in Florida. It’s not like we go on Safaris.)

But I just felt bad. I feel bad either way. She said I had blocked her from her grandchild, which was very emotional for her, although she’d been talking with her regularly and went out with her and I never limited her contact. I just didn’t want her going to sleep away camp that already wasn’t going so well without my permission.

I had blocked her for a few weeks. I needed the space. I kept hearing her criticism in my head. But it’s not like she couldn’t have contacted me in various ways. She has no feeling that she did anything wrong—and she never does. This is pretty much always the pattern. She’s getting older, and I worry about us not speaking when she dies or that she will need something health related and not tell me. But I also don’t know why she can’t see the things she does and says are cruel and that it’s ok to have some boundaries.

I don’t know if she’s legitimately BPD. My therapist thought so. I’m not the only person in her life she has these problems with, but I’m her only child.

Honestly, I wish I hadn’t contacted her, but the guilt tore me up. [/quote]

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