Reply to what to do if your significant other can't or won't do your love language?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Boyfriend of 8 months is extremely kind, consistent, reliable, and genuine. He's not particularly emotionally expressive. We've shared about our love languages (his is physical touch and mine is words of affirmation). I'm really good about physical touch with/for him (both sexual and non-sexual), but he doesn't freely share his feelings about me unless I bring it up or ask.

He has said he adores me and cares about me after I've brought it up, but I don't want to have to ask for that every time and I've told him it's important to me. I'm also good about modeling it (I tell him he's means a lot to me, for example). He's wonderful about giving general compliments such as, "you're amazing, you're beautiful, you're so gracious, etc". However, I don't like sharing my heart/mind/body with someone who can't or won't say how they feel about me.

Is the problem with me- are my expectations unrealistic? Or is this worth breaking up over?

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One thing to keep in mind is that men who are good with words about feelings aren't good with them for your sake.  They are just generally good with words, for EVERYONE.  They've said these words of affirmation a thousand times to a thousand women.  It's not special whatsoever.  Certainly it is much better to have a man who behaves well rather than talks well. [/quote]

This.  It's fine if that's what you need to feel loved, I guess, but it's not a sign that the guy actually loves you more (or at all).  It's usually a sign that he's comfortable saying these kinds of things, that his personality is effusive or that he's from a culture or family or personality that frequently expresses affection.  It might mean that he's learned this is a good way to get chicks.  Don't confuse the way that someone expresses love with the intensity or sincerity of their love.  [/quote]

What a ridiculous argument you make! It makes her feel good. That's what's important.

Imagine dcum saying to men: "your girlfriend having sex with you is not a sign that she actually loves you. It's usually a sign that she is comfortable having sex and that she has a high libido. It might mean that she has learned that frequent sex is a good way to get boyfriends. Don't confuse frequent sex with love."

Many men will say " sign me up!".
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