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[quote=Anonymous]Honestly, this sounds like normal family stuff. Maybe not ideal, and very frustrating but if you have decided you are going to do this trip, you will just kind of have some of this. We have much of the same with our families. Our parents are in their 70s and set in their ways. We have had some really unpleasant trips but have worked to make it better. My husband and I deal with it by having a sit-down "couple meeting" prior to leaving and laying out the following:

* Must-dos for the whole family, kids, and each adult for the trip (one issue with us is my parents are slooooow to get moving and it makes it so we miss opportunities for activities), so we define it ahead of time and I will have a frank conversation: "Mom, we need to do X for Larla. It's our priority for her for this trip. We would like to do it on this day and if you are up for it, we would love you to join - does that work for you? Is another day better?" For the adult must-dos, mine for a recent beach trip was taking our dog solo to the beach at night. I got to do that. DH wanted to sleep in two days. I don't really sleep well on vacation so he got to do it almost every day.

* Hard nos - Example is that his mom can get very negative about certain people we know when she drinks. It is a hard no that my kids not be around it.

* Let it gos - We know the patterns we fall in. The seafood thing resonated with me - my parents don't want to cook and then are aghast at the price of the seafood we are paying for. I am not going to change that dynamic so I take a deep breath and look at the ocean and let it go. We will spend some time just the two of us kind of commiserating. It helps. 
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