Reply to "Maybe she will decide to be the best mom ever and stay home..."

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yep she's totally right you'll be a better mother if you stay at home. Choose to work if you want to but you must know that's what you're sacrificing.[/quote]

Proven to be untrue in study after study.  And certainly in my case.  My mother was a loving but inept SAHM.  My siblings and I would have been far better off with a WOHM and an educated nanny.  [/quote]

While I don't personally care if someone is a SAHM or a WOHM (or a WFHM or works PT or goes to school or whatever), comments like this always exhaust me. For the millionth time:

Many (most) working parents cannot afford an "educated nanny." These are not the choices presented to most people. I have a freaking law degree and couldn't afford a FT nanny -- it was either daycare or SAHM until kid was old enough for preschool. I did the latter and have zero regrets, even if I wasn't the "best mom ever." I think what I provided my kid was better than they would have had in daycare. I guess a good nanny could have been more efficient or on top of things, but would she have loved my kid as much as I do? No.

I'm sorry your mom didn't live up to your expectations, but this idea that all women have to do is work and then they can magically have a top flight nanny who will provide their kids with the best possible childhood is ridiculous. Most of us simply don't make enough money for that.

I don't think a SAHM is a better mom than a WOHM (I currently work, so I definitely don't think that) but I do think in certain, common circumstances, a SAHM is preferable to the [i]available [/i]childcare alternatives. It certainly was in my case.[/quote]

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