Reply to SIL wants us to write her girls letters at camp

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sure. My SIL dropped the rope and now my kids never get presents or cards for birthdays and Christmas from my brother and his family. You too can drop the rope, just so long as you're fine not having relationships with your nieces and nephews. [/quote]

Your brother is pretty awful. Nature, nurture or both? Good for his wife for not trying to “fix” his relationships with his family: that’s his choice. [/quote]

FWIW, it means she is also choosing not to have a good relationship with the kids who call her "aunt." They're not as hung up on the fact that she is their aunt "by marriage." In their minds, she's just their aunt, and in that family, neither the uncle nor the aunt seem to care to get to know the kids.[/quote]

I was team no need to write the girls, but this hit me.  Both my parents had only brothers.  Yes, men need to get better at this stuff but I watched my aunts fawn over their nieces and nephews by blood and basically ignore us.[b]  Why not build the relationship?[[/b]/quote]

Maybe they were shut down?  Maybe they tried but, your mom/dad didn't want it or encourage it?  Sometimes you give up when you are hitting your head on the wall all in the name of "boundaries"[/quote]

I'm sure this happens in a lot of families, but did not seem to be the case in mine at all.  I think my four aunts just gravitated to their siblings' children rather than their husband's siblings' children.  Like aunts would host both sides of family for Christmas but only buy gifts for their side.  Likely my uncles dropped the ball.  It has continued in adulthood with wedding/baby showers, birthdays, etc.  It's not a huge deal, but neither is 5 minutes to drop a card in the mail.[/quote]

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