Reply to Why do I like it when people feel sorry for me?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Narcissism. Classic.[/quote]

A narcissist wouldn’t have enough self-awareness to notice this about herself or admit that she’s bothered by it.  OP is not a narcissist.

I have some family members who love being victims.  My take is they didn’t get enough attention as children and crave attention now.  I’m the opposite- I hate to be pitied in any way.  I had a parent die when I was young and it awful hearing everyone whisper about how sorry they felt for me.  Their pity confirmed how sad my situation was.  I combatted this by striving to be envied.  I might have a sad home life, but by golly, I was one of the smartest, most beautiful and well-dressed girls at school. I had the best jewelry and handbag collection. I might have a big hole in my life but the other girls all envied me, at least on the surface.

[/quote]

I'm PP above. Yes, by cultivating their envy, you were persecuting them. You were sure that showing your ability to persecute others could empower you and stop you from being a victim. It made you feel in control, even as it relied on persecuting others to get that feeling.

We all do this, in different ways, until we learn to see it and get off the triangle. [/quote]

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