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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not OP but I also want to note the perception of the behavior, if you are laughing, giggling and bantering with a guy...that is going to be perceived by others and myself as flirting.

Whether it is innocent, light flirting or not.

I think the perception adds to this consideration.

I know some of you guys and girls are doing it as "innocent" and in your heart it's not the type of communication to lead to more while you are in "the act" but the perception shows something different if that makes sense. [/quote]

I'm one of the PPs whose standard mode of interacting is apparently flirtations and I don't care about this. If somebody thinks I'm flirting with them, what's it to me? I'm not going to try to modify by behavior with all men just in case somebody thinks I'm flirting. If I did get the sense that somebody was interested in more, I would just mention that I'm married (and back in the day when I dated, I just declined to go on dates with people I wasn't interested in). [/quote]

So bottom line is people like you are just self absorbed attention seekers so  to answer the question OP.

If you can tolerate being in a relationship with someone who constantly needs to be the center of attention no matter your feelings on the matter. If you want to be gaslit and told you're to sensitive and insecure. Stay.

If not leave because your boyfriend won't change.[/quote]

I'm self absorbed because I don't think I should have to stop "bantering and laughing?" Disagree. In fact I think it would be more self-absorbed to pay a lot of attention to myself because I assume a guy might think I'm flirting. I seriously couldn't hold a normal conversation because I'd be thinking about me, not the person I'm talking to.

But the guy the OP is talking about is not "bantering and laughing." I think what he is doing is actually trying to take down the self esteem of his partner down a notch by paying attention to other women. It's not even flirting, it's negging.[/quote]

You're self absorbed that you don't give a shit that your behavior hurts other people and is inappropriate in 90,% of situations. If you can't as an adult figure out how to have a pleasant conversation without flirting there's something wrong with you. Attention seeking immature and likely a narcissist [/quote]

I don’t think I’m flirting though. If somebody else interprets it that way that’s on them. Are you a woman? Do you honestly think it would be harmful for a woman who isn’t interested in a man to laugh at his joke? Personally I like it when I see my husband having fun with somebody if any gender. It makes him happy. If he was winking or staring into her eyes or asking for a phone number, no, that’s not okay. But laughing? I am pro-laughing.

If somebody said that what I was doing was hurtful I would stop for sure. But i think that we put this ridiculous pressure on women to act a certain way because men just cannot emotionally handle rejection. I and my girlfriends have been rejected many times because we mistook friendliness for interest, and none of us ever said “ugh how dare that guy banter with people he’s not interested in.” You only hear people say that about girls and women. [/quote]
I agree with you. I think the person criticizing you is the same one criticizing me, and he seems angry. I disengaged. [/quote]

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