Reply to Would you include mother in law in holidays and life events if she was like this?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]she got out of the car in rage and didn’t talk to me for 4 months, she was shaking and crying because I talked back to her and ranted that I was so disrespectful. It’s just a lot. We are both adults but she wants this weird dynamic where she’s the parent who can scold us and we just have to sit and take it without any sort of reasoning back or defending our decisions. [/quote]

She’s an elder, children should respect their elders. Teach your children to do better than you were taught by not talking back to their grandma. It’s just rude. If you need to address it then you sit down away from children, you don’t talk back in front of children. I’m beginning to think you have no manners and granny is just trying to teach them to you too. [/quote]

Respect is a two-way street. My granddad was my “elder” but he was a blatant racist. Do you think it would have been “polite” to allow him to say racist slurs in my presence? Hell no. When he would say something racist I would say, “If you say anything like that again today, I am leaving.” When I had a baby who was so small she was in a carseat, he said the n-word in front of her and I said, “If you ever say anything like that again in my presence or in the presence of my husband or child, not only will I leave, but you will never see me again.” He never said anything of the sort in my presence.

“Elder” my foot. If someone is old that does not give them license to be racist, rude, disparaging, disrespectful or unkind. You teach people how to treat you, and no one will ever learn that they can be rude to me or my family and not expect pushback.[/quote]

Someone who was an addict usually has toxic behavior ingrained in them even when they do become sober. [/quote]

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