Reply to Those in your 40s and 50s, if you had kids later in life, do you regret it?

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Reply to "Those in your 40s and 50s, if you had kids later in life, do you regret it?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I replied above and am happy to be an older mom, but I would also say that if money is the only thing holding you back, just do it. If you are homeless, then wait, but if you are just trying to save for a house or trying to feel more financially secure-just do it. Having a baby is always a risk, but you will figure out your money. My partner and I did not have high salaries or maternity leave, then we had a 1/2 million dollar preemie and I was in the hospital for over two weeks. Then our car died and we had 20k in medical debt. It sucked but we managed (with no help from family).[/quote]

Agree with this. I just posted about waiting because I married late but I would not have waited barring being totally broke if I had married earlier. [/quote]

Also agree! You just don’t know if you will have fertility problems until you try. I had my youngest when I was 36 (which seemed fine at the time) but now he’s 8 and it feels like long road until he even graduates high school. I love my kids but they really take a lot of energy.[/quote]

I think one of the worst parts about delaying to mid/late 30s (whether you intended or not) is feeling rushed to have #2. I see late 30s moms with an 18 month old and newborn and just feel exhausted looking at them … [/quote]

I was that mom with a newborn and 22 month old. It was exhausting the first year, but now at 5 and 7 they're best friends and play together for hours. They have all the same interests and extracurriculars, so I'm not rushing around to so many different activities. I would say in the long term it's much easier than a 4+ age gap.[/quote]

fine but nobody should be forced to do that because they were trying to save for a down payment. and of course risk of developmental disabilities rises with age. I know lots of 40-something parents with a closely-spaced autistic sibling. [/quote]

You're missing some data. Autism risk rises with a 5+ year age gap between siblings, an 18 month or less age gap between siblings, advanced paternal age, a large age gap between parents, and being a teen mom. But you also seem to forget that autism is also genetic. The risk doesn't apply to all "late 30s moms".[/quote]

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