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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Some responses here have been very helpful. Others are pretty judgmental and one sided.

My sister had a lot of issues growing up. I am not so worried about autism and ADHD. The bipolar is what it really worries me, she has intense mood swings, isn't necessarily on meds and has shown to have poor judgment with relationships. She has trouble taking care of herself in basic ways, and needs a lot of support. She is fortunate that her husband is very supportive. I don't know if he has a learning disability, he might have slight one. He is employed in a blue collar job. His family is very close knit and is very involved in their lives. His mom is a bit of helicopter parent.

My family was extremely dysfunctional for various reasons. I was not the golden child. What happened is that my sister needed lots of support and so the other children to some extent were supposed to grow up fast and be perfect and not cause too much trouble.

I am not jealous she is having a child. I am worried about the child. I don't know if she has what it takes to be a good parent and I worry that the child might not get what it needs from her. We don't talk once a year, we see each other once a year. We do calls in between but they are usually pretty one sided and they are all about her and her issues but she doesn't think to ask about me or anything in my life. So I don't usually call her very often. I feel she might not be equipped to handle being a parent. She didn't have a good relationship especially with my dad, and I don't have a super close relationship with my parents either. I am concerned that she is taking on more than she can at this time. [/quote]

You're not super close to your parents, but throughout this thread you've said they're 100% supportive of your sister, said it breaks your heart they may not get to meet your sister's unborn child, that they didn't deserve your sister cutting them off. You state that you feel that she partially cut your parents off because they "made sure" she took psychiatric meds, but she doesn't want to take them, but you feel she needs to take them. Throughout this thread you've done a lot of identification with and defense of your parents. For your sister, you've done a lot of saying she needs to be medicated, that she's mentally ill, and that her husband is probably mentally off as well.

You're "worried." You "feel." You're "concerned." Even though you admit she has her close-knit, involved in laws. Why is this your worry? Because you are making it your worry. The child is not born. You have no idea what kind of mother she'll be. And if there are issues, she has her loving in-laws to express concern.
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