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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I like you, hated mother's day. Especially the first couple of years after having my first kid. Because not only did I have to adequately celebrate my horrible mom and my fine stepmom (who actively pulls back from being appreciated but also is hurt if I do nothing), but I also have to ensure that I am properly celebrated because everyone will ask me what I did for mother's day and seem disappointed if it wasn't at least halfway decent. So I spent probably my first 4-5 years as a mother resenting the eff out of the entire experience, especially when my husband sometimes could not even meet the low bar of 'do something so when someone asks, I can say I got flowers.'

But in the last couple of years I have worked hard on reframing this day. First, my actual children, the oldest who is now 6 especially, put a LOT of their hard work into their little trinkets. They work really hard on art and special rocks etc to make the day special. And my grumpiness was depriving them of sharing their love with me. And depriving me of fully enjoying it. Also, my mom does suck, but it isn't my fault she sucks. I check the box there, and I don't let myself be weighed down by her general suckiness. I also moved far away from her so I don't have any day-of obligations. And I engaged my stepmom a little more honestly and improved that overall relationship. And as a result, I quite enjoyed yesterday. My kids were nice to me, we went to brunch and a playground, they showered me with things they had gathered, and I called my mom and didn't think of her again.

Try to figure out how to set yourself up for more success here. It really is nice to let some of this resentment go. [/quote]

IN FACT! This is my post from last year: https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/970134.page

Some of the feedback I got in that post, along with a particularly heartfelt gift from my 5 year old, softened me up a lot last year. And then this year I guess without my even knowing it, it sunk in a bit![/quote]

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