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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am assuming your MIL is a different race and culture from nanny?  Yes, you protect your nanny.  MIL is not to interfere.

Honestly, if MIL is home all day, I'd switch the daycare so that she can't micro manage.[/quote]

Yes, Nanny has been very understanding but we all have our limit and MIL is too much period.  I usually leave Nanny check on the kitchen counter and I have a feeling mil saw it and she thinks it's way too much. Same for the water and electric bills. She thinks we spend too much.  She also boils water to drink instead water bottle or using a filter. [/quote]

This woman is going to ruin your marriage and the family life you were envisioning if you don't nip all these behaviors in the bud. Why is she living with you? Is that a forever thing? If so, time for some serious talks and groundrules. [/quote]

Dh and I talked to his mother last night and she listened, told us [b]she was only trying to help[/b], she didn't think the nanny was that upset, she agree not to interfere with nanny job, [b]and my husband has agreed to find either a neighbor or hire someone to take his mother on activities while we work. Hopefully, my mother-in-law time will be occupied and away from the house for at least 3 to 4 hours a day.[/b] I want our nanny to be comfortable without mother-in-law shadowing her every move. My mother-in-law will be living with us permanently because her husband passed away a few years ago and my husband decided to bring her over. I didn't think to set rules and regulation without knowing how involved, she was going to be around my kids and our nanny. My husband family is originally from Poland. My mother-in-law is very smart and used to having nannies, housekeepers, and etc. I need her to know that our nanny is not there for her. Nanny is a previous Middle School math teacher, she has raised her own kids, and after retirement, became a nanny to occupied her time and make money obviously. I do not want to lose a fantastic nanny because my mother-in-law wants to interfere.[/quote]

I think this is really the issue, OP. Your MIL moved here and knows no one except your family and has nothing to do except "take care" of your family. Are there other things she could do, like volunteer somewhere? Is there a community she could join, like a church,

or a crafting group? What would she enjoy doing? She could probably make a real contribution somewhere if you could find the right fit. [/quote]

Mother-in-law does have a church group that gets together twice a week and a Reading group that she attends on the weekend. Because of Covid, she doesn’t want to be out and about, she is 70 years old, she’s healthy and Active.[/quote]

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