Reply to My DC committed but is not happy

Forum Index » College and University Discussion

Reply to "My DC committed but is not happy - anyone else?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I'm a mom of a freshman.  OP, I think if you leave it alone and don't feed into it, your son's feelings will even out over time.

As for you, just ride it out.  I get it that for you, the big stress is over and what an accomplishment! --and it's frustrating that your kid is not basking in it, which takes the fun out of it for you.  FWIW,

But please, don't feed it.  My friend's mom jumps whenever her kid complains.  He was a 2020 grad. He accepted School A, then changed his mind and accepted School B, then A, then B, then took a gap year.  Then this last fall, went to school B, then over winter break, transferred to School A.  After spring he transferred back to School B.  He's currently at School B but complaining and my friend is looking at local School C.

First of all, I am *shocked* that all this could happen over and over like this, (but the two schools are not selective).  But this is clearly some sort of mom-son enmeshed situation.  Instead of just listening to her son complain, she gets on the phone with admissions or whatever and changes whatever he is complaining about.  Fundamentally not understanding that there will always be a complaint, therefore the job is to listen, not to fix the complaint.

The latest is he is complaining about his roommate.  Apparently the roommate goes to bed at 11pm and requests that he study down the hall if after 11pm so the lights are off in the room.  Son said that it's lonely down the hall by himself. Mom asked me if that was worth her getting her son's roommate switched out, because going to bed at 11pm was "not college-like behavior."

(She and I live in different worlds, that's for sure.) I just told her that it was reasonable behavior, and it's a good problem to have vs wild hours and drinking etc, and if her son wanted to study at night, to go down the hall. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics