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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hi OP, I had to check at first because I was wondering if you were me.

But, with my friend at least, she would never ask me to Venmo her - she would have said of you have us over so much, let me get this.

We have family friends woh have kids the same age, and as you say over covid especially it was just easier to get together with them fairly exclusively over other people.  We always host.  Sometimes we cook and elaborate meal (because we like to) and when they come to our house they're like oh we just did a 5 mile hike or did this or that fun thing and I feel annoyed that I'm sacrificing my entire afternoon to make dinner for people who are out doing fun things.  If there was reciprocity, that's one thing, but when it's entirely one sided it can grate.

A couple of things - 
- when you invite them over, if you're ordering food in, I'd arrange it so that you each ordered (and thus paid) separately.  With our friends, we'd each place our order and pay online, then the friends would pick both up on their way to our house.  Or we'd meet in a park, bring your own dinner.

- pick and choose when to invite them (and sometimes what to serve).  We've taken subtle breaks over the years, then start inviting them again.  Or I intentionally make sure whatever is for dinner is easy and simple.

- ask them to pick up beer or wine or dessert.  Oh, we're out of beer - would you mind getting some on your way over?  This is harder to do, but we do it sometimes.  [/quote]

Um, no one forced you to cook an elaborate meal. I dislike people like you who do OTT cooking for a casual get-together and then try to guilt us because we don’t want to do the same. I’d rather spend a nice Saturday afternoon hiking and then order a pizza, rather than slaving over a hot stove.

Also, it’s really rude to ask guests to bring food. If they offer then fine, but it’s odd to assign them things. Just stop inviting them if you can’t afford the time or money.[/quote]

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