Reply to 40-year-old man in a 1BR condo

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Reply to "40-year-old man in a 1BR condo – problem?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Nope. Better than then roommate rental situation my friends found their husband's in.

I actually see the paid off mortgage as a plus - you and your spouse should be able to put a much larger down payment down when you're ready.[/quote]

OP doesn’t want to get married. He’s married to his mom. [/quote]

This.  Mommy and Daddy take care of OP when he’s there and make no demands.  Complete turnoff.[/quote]

OP here.  Would it also be a “complete turnoff“ if I had a trust fund?  Or if my parents lived far away and gave me an annual gift that I happened to use to pay for a chef?  Because as I mentioned, I don’t enjoy the ceaseless, mundane tasks involved in cooking my own food, so even if I didn’t live near my parents, I would find some way to outsource that labor.  I also don’t like cleaning and have a housekeeper that cleans my condo.  I work hard at my job and choose to spend the rest of my time doing things that I enjoy.

I have a great relationship with my parents and, as mentioned, find nature therapeutic so I love spending time in their backyard when the weather is nice.  Not sure why so many people find this distasteful.  Based on other threads, DCUM finds coming from a wealthy family to be a plus in a partner (not that my parents are super wealthy).  But apparently, if aid comes in the form of assistance with life’s mundane tasks instead of in cash - and where I also get to spend time with my parents - that is a “complete turnoff.”[/quote]

Because that's not what you said!  You didn't say you find cooking and cleaning to be mundane and boring.  That's normal and fine.  You said that you find it to be a tremendous amount of effort.  THAT is weird and off-putting.  It's really not that hard unless you're exceptionally lazy or incompetent.

Spending time with your parents is fine, but you have to understand that nobody really wants that much time with their in-laws.  Where are you going to get your fix of hanging around in a SFH and yard that you don't have to do any work to maintain?

It just seems like you can't handle a whole lot.  Couldn't have a relationship because you'd be "bogged down" at work-- well, a lot of people are able to do well at both.  Set up your life to avoid stress-- well, some people find that a little stress is worth it for a fuller and richer life, or they just aren't stressed out by the things you seem to be.  That's what's off-putting about it.[/quote]

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