Reply to s/o finding a half sibling placed in adoption

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Are you unhappy? Unfulfilled? I really don’t get the draw to want to have relationship with every person you are related to.  It’s ok to not know a half sibling, or care.
 
Focus on your own family.  [/quote]
I think most people think a sibling  is family.   Again,  louder for those in the back- a SIBLING.  As in-  "another child your parent (s) had."  Sibling. 50% of your DNA or 25% if it is a half sibling.

Not a second cousin  once removed  or some aunt from the "old country." A sibling. [/quote]

A sibling is a sibling because you were raised together by the same parents.  A “sibling” that shares 25% DNA that was raised by different people in a different location all their life if no more family to you than a random stranger [/quote]

I can’t help wondering about all these absolute pronouncements the same person keeps making, when others are posting their experiences that their relationships with their genetic relatives ARE significant.  I can’t help but think it is an adoptive parent who wants to minimize the significance of genetic connection.

I grew up with a sibling who I can barely stand, and I have two genetic half-sisters, one who found is when I was in my 20’s and one who I found in my 40’s.  I am much closer to both of them than I am to the sibling with whom I share 50% DNA and shared childhood memories.  I “click” with one sister in an uncanny way.  I have a tremendous amount of things in common with my other sister.  Our physical resemblance and the resemblance of our children to each other or our mother is meaningful.  They are my FAMILY.  They were before I ever knew them.

Just because you don’t grow up with people doesn’t mean they are not your family.  My granny lived on another continent and I didn’t have a relationship with her ‘till I turned 19, but she was my family.  Just because I didn’t know my sister yet then doesn’t mean she is any less my family.

Your mileage may vary.  But for me, DNA connections are significant and important.

Wishing OP luck finding her sibling![/quote]

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