Reply to My MIL died suddenly and my mom didn’t even send a card

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "My MIL died suddenly and my mom didn’t even send a card "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Does your husband even care? If my MIL didn't send a condolence card, I would not care at all.

If your husband does not care that much about this, consider that you are doing what your mom does and making this about you and your issues, and that maybe your husband doesn't want to turn this into another conversation about your mother.

Finally, you are having what psychologists might call an "outsized reaction" based on a whole bunch of baggage. Get help for that. Seriously. Narcissistic (or just otherwise self involved and selfish) parents are the bread and butter of psychologists, and really can screw with kids well into adulthood. [/quote]

I don’t know if he cares. She’s routinely late to send him Birthday gifts, and he says he doesn’t care. I have not brought this up to him because I don’t want to make it about me, but I’m embarrassed by my mom’s reaction. It’s very possible that it doesn’t bother him, but it’s a loss for me too and I’d think my mom would at the very very least ask about how I or my husband or kids are doing in the face of one of the biggest losses of our lives. But she hasn’t and won’t. Because she doesn’t care.  That’s the bottom line. I need to accept and move on. Thank you dcum for point this out. [/quote]

Again, this has become not about what your husband needs but what you needed and never got from your mom. I empathize but as a grown woman you will need to stop this obsession if you want to heal your own narcissistic wound. People do things because of who they are and not because of who you are. Surely you have a lot of love and care in your life — focus on that and on your own capacity to meet your needs.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics