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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My oldest is in 8th grade and will be choosing classes soon for HS next year. I know it’s early and we are not putting pressure on them to research colleges or do early SAT prep or anything of the sort. We don’t even care much about top schools despite having a pretty smart kid who has been on the advanced track (I know, a dime a dozen around here!).

I was on my own for college planning when I was in HS and it also seems like a totally different ballgame now.

Any advice for those of us whose kids are just getting into the HS years? Anything you wish your DC had done differently? Anything to ease the stress of it all?[/quote]

My advice is to not think about college at all until junior year. Don't even mention it to your child. If she brings it up, then you can answer questions, but do not offer advice or anything at all about college. Don't even think about college prep, other than to make sure your kids takes the normal English, math, science, social studies and language courses that most 4-year colleges require. But don't mention those in terms of college! Almost all high schools require those courses to graduate.

I made the HUGE mistake of bringing up college when my kid was in 8th grade!! I wanted to do everything right, prepare my really bright kid to get into a college I deemed worthy of her exceptional intellect!! It completely backfired. 100% backfired. My kid pushed back, and refused to work in high school, stumbling along, despite my pressure. I finally gave up, and told DH to work with her. She did bring up her grades, but it was too late by then. She did well on standardized tests (1560 on the SAT, 35 on the ACT), but so what? With a 3.2, she's not getting into any selective college.

It also really tainted my relationship with her. Every time I brought up college or grades, my kid started yelling at me, so I just stopped completely. If I could do it over again, I'd never have brought it up  until junior year, and then only asked her what she wanted to do, and let her figure it out or ask for help.

But your kid may be different, I don't know. Mine is extremely bright, like Rhodes Scholar bright, and a great athlete, and my ambitions for her far exceed her own. Her teachers agree that she's exceptional, but doesn't show it very often in her schoolwork.

Enjoy your kid, OP. She'll be off to college before you know it, and you won't have the chance to repair the mistakes you've made. But you can learn from my mistakes. [/quote]

You sound like a psycho too [/quote]

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