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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We're in the same boat. Three-year gap. It was truly miserable when the youngest was between 1 and 2 and the oldest was 4 to 5, in 2020. Covid shutdown in a small condo with kids these ages was... indescribable. I honestly wonder how we survived. Much of that year is blocked from my memory.

So, sooooo much empathy to what you're going through OP.

As others have said, life has improved as the kids have gotten older. I still referee a few fights a day, but things are getting better.

Some things that really helped?

1. We enrolled the oldest in all-day preschool. It's outdoors so he comes home too exhausted to fight. And the youngest is an angel when the oldest isn't here.
[b]
2. We started a behavior chart for the oldest. He gets a gold star each day that he doesn't have a tantrum. If he gets five stars a week, he gets dessert or a toy on Friday. His behavior changed overnight. No exaggeration. In 24 hours we went from 10-12 tantrums and fights a day to zero. It taught us that he could behave, which was something I had previously questioned.[/b]

3. As soon as the youngest can go to preschool, he'll go. At a certain point, usually way younger than you think, kids just need more stimulation than we can give them at home (unless you're prepared to basically home school starting at 2). I am not a crafty mom or an artsy one. Pre-Covid, I managed toddlerhood with a lot of time at museums, kidzones, etc. But since our youngest absolutely refuses to mask and can't yet be vaccinated, we are stuck with home and park now. We're both so over this routine. He needs more stimulation and he'll get it at preschool the minute he's eligible.

Lastly, don't be afraid of screen time. A lot of people have this crazed, knee-jerk reaction to it. But, carefully curated screen time can be really educational and helpful at home - especially during the pandemic when we often have few other options. I highly recommend the BBC kids' shows Alphablocks and Numberblocks. Our five yo watches these obsessively and can do math at at least a second-grade level - according to his teachers. (He can also do algebraic word problems, which school has confirmed too.)

Hang in there, OP. It gets better!
[/quote]

This is a good post. Yes, bribes (sticker charts, toys, etc.) work. My kid was a biter and we have (God willing) moved past that phase with bribes for good behavior days.[/quote]

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